It’s Baby Shower Day!!!! Gina and I are so excited!
Blessings
Despite the fact that my pregnancy is getting harder physically (numb arm and fingers now, increased vomiting again, heat= super swollen, constant lower back ache, blah, blah, blah…), I’m having one of those weeks where I’m really diggin’ being pregnant. Watching the babies move, feeling Gina find little body parts and talk to the babies… it’s the best thing I have ever, EVER done. I feel more joy, gratitude and love in my heart than I can barely contain. In fact, I may just be overflowing. And the baby shower hasn’t even come!
I’m present to the TWO blessings that are growing and developing inside of me. I’m humbled by all the mamas in my life that are gifting us their children’s past belongings (diaper covers, swaddles, blankets… you name it). Gifts from our baby registry are starting to arrive on our doorstep daily now from friends from afar. Neighbors, friends and family are excited for us and inquiring more about us, how we are, how the babies are and what they can do to help. I’m such a community girl; this baby-making is bringing my community up and out like I’ve never known. It makes me all warm and fuzzy and humbled, in the deepest sense of the word.
Twins Learning
We had our Multiple Expectation Class yesterday– it was awesome. It was hosted by the hospital where we will deliver. They had special chairs for those of us on modified bed-rest so I was totally comfortable the whole time, plus there was air conditioning!
It was powerful to be a room of 7 other couples who all are expecting twins and dealing with all the same joys, concerns, and risks that I’ve been writing about here. They all felt as much validation and relief being in the same room together as I did. The class itself was super informative. The facilitators REALLY spent a lot of time on the “preventing pre-term labor thing” which we expected, and then much time on birthing in the OR (which we’ll all need to do) and prepped us for all the ins and outs of a C-Section given 50% of the women in the room will end up having one. They also spent a lot of time on what to expect if our babies go to the NICU, because again, statistically, most people in the room will have their babies go there. One of the facilitators had her babies born at 31 weeks; her babies were in the NICU 5 1/2 weeks. Learning her story was empowering (as opposed to frightening).
Then, the whole last half was on post-birth; how to be super organized and drill sergeant like about getting support and help once the kids are here. How to put notes on the doors and fridge about help, when and how to have visitors– and not all just generic but very specific to twins… it was so awesome, even if a bit daunting. The message was, you can sort of slide with setting boundaries with one, but with two, it’s survial, you can’t slide. You (we) MUST be firm and clear and create clear guidelines for visitors, friends, family. When and how to visit, help, cook, etc.
I left very clear that we have NO idea what we are in for with two! But also totally excited that we get two and very certain that even if it feels impossible at times, it’ll all work out.
Affirmations
So, I finally started making those affirmations that I’ve been wanting to, hence the title of this post. I was thinking about all the things I’m grateful for — specific to my body– and this one just popped up and out at me. I couldn’t help but make it. I love my uterus. I do! It’s working so well, so great and soon in overtime, not just for me but for all of us. I’m really grateful! I made a few other affirmations, too.
Nuff said.
This one lives on the fridge next to the ultrasound pics.
Some of these are also for birth day.
This one is for now and for birth day and for after...
The Resting Thing
Like I wrote in the last post, even though I’m not working, I’m not on vacation. That said, I have noticed my body settling, resting more deeply and really sinking into the “taking it super easy” thing. I like it. I have the most energy in the morning and by about 2 or 3pm I fade fast. And it’s okay. In fact, more than okay. I’m feeling more peaceful, more calm and more excited about meeting these girls than ever.
Each week that goes by and they are more developed it makes me feel more at ease. The more rest I take and the more water I drink, the more I keep these girls cooking… the more empowered and happy I feel. It was cool to see the other women in the class feeling this too (or just learning it, or pushed it too hard and put in hospital but now got it… we are all on our own unique journeys but with the same goal in mind–hence, that same sense of accomplishment and increased peace with each week and even each day that the kids stay “in” was shared by us all). One woman told us that her doc told her that by this stage in our pregnancies each day in the womb takes three days off a NICU stay out of the womb. So for her, she really celebrates each day. I love it.
I also had a really, really awesome chat with a friend, Cindi, (whom I share some of the same values with) who wasn’t wanting or planning a C-Section but it went that way anyway– and for her, in the end, it really was a great experience. It shifted something for me seeing and hearing that as a real possibility. After my chat with Cindi and the class yesterday, I’m feeling so much more at peace with the possibility of not only a C-Section but of anything going “wrong” or not the way we’d prefer. Of course my mind knows that it’s very unlikely that it’ll all go the way we want/plan/dream. Previously, I had been okay with that so long at the “things that went awry” were small and not big. Totally conditional, I know. 🙂 But now, I feel like we can handle and be with however it all goes. In the end, we are blessed. Period.
So, another day and another week. So much to look forward to. Baby shower today, floating in the pool each week (at a new prenatal aqua class), more natural birthing classes, another ultrasound where I’ll get to see and hear my babies and most of all… more time to just be with Gina, myself and quiet. While I don’t know much about what’s to come, I know enough to know that it’ll be decades before I have quiet time just for me like this again. Maybe that’s also part of why I’m so happy and blissed out right now? Just soaking it all in. Then again, could be all the awesome feel-good hormones. Well, whatever. I’ll take it.