Weekly Update
I go to my OB weekly now. Seems strange given how much harder it is for me to be mobile and how she; my midwife suggest I don’t go anywhere else. But, it also makes good sense as the tighter the quarters the girls have, the increase in risk for them needing to come out. So, off I go.
This past Friday was a pretty non-eventful appointment, which is what we like.
– My BP was still pretty low (though a tad higher as I had just left a potential buyer for the Volvo that was a little insane).
– My weight is 192 (up three pounds from week before)
– My uterus still measures 46cm
I had a few questions: “What if I go into labor before November 16th?” and “What’s the likelihood that you’ll nick my baby in surgery?” and a few others. They were all good questions she said and went on to answer:
Basically, if lose my mucous plug or have spotting, no need to come in. If my water breaks or contractions start coming on strong 4-5 minutes apart regularly, go in asap. She may or may not be able to be there but she told me about the docs on call and that she would trust any of them with her C-Section. Hmph.
As far as nicking the baby; she was honest. She said, it does happen. She has seen a resident do it. It’s a really a low percentage of the time and usually only happens when the uterus is paper thin. The cut to the baby is usually on her bum and is minimal- they don’t do anything for it. Still, I don’t like that at all… but I needed to know for my own reassurance what’s the possibility of it happening and what does it look like if it does. She says she “tents” the uterus up and cuts that way so as to prevent from nicking the baby. Good info but also too much info. Oy.
My Mom
My mom is gone back to Boulder now. I was a little worried how I’d fare with her gone but I truly think she was SO helpful that it allowed me to feel much better this past week. I’m deeply grateful for all she did. Just weeks away from her 70th birthday, she worked tirelessly for me and us. Gina got a break for caring for me too and we are now all set with food in the freezer and laundry all caught up and we are both much more rested. SUCH a gift, Mom. Thank you doesn’t even begin.
While my mom was here she read a book on Becoming a Grandmother by a babybook author I really like, Sheila Kitzinger. I read little parts of it myself and it’s just lovely. It helped my mom and I to better understand the transition that takes place not only for her in being a Grandmother but the shift that happens in OUR relationship. There is both a separation of sorts as I enter my own state of motherhood but there is also now a shared commonality. Anyway, I was grateful to my midwife for loaning that to us. I recommend it for any mother or daughter in this transition.
Gina and Me
This weekend we are tying up more loose ends: getting the monitor hung, prints hung, warmer curtains hung in our front room, smoke alarms all secured, packing the hospital bag, trying to sell the car, buying a new (used) car, making phone tree lists, getting the car seats together, etc. Gina is working both as an interpreter this weekend and at home doing all this. I’m doing bits where I can and from the couch online. Together: we rock.
We still think we’ll go 38 weeks but know enough by now that we should really have some of those major things done, so this weekend is it. Our goal. Anything after this should be little (though we won’t have the car thing sorted for another couple of weeks- if at all before they arrive).
That said, we got a glitch in our plans. Gina brought up the Double Snap-N-Go (a wire frame stroller that is lightweight and holds 2 infant car seats so that we don’t have to lug around the big jogger stroller everywhere). We busted out our “special” infant car seats, the ones we got because they are the only brand compatible with our regular double stroller and wouldn’t you know, it’s the one brand that does NOT work with the Snap-N-Go.
So frustrating! All this baby gear stuff is just so overwhelming, such a racket if you ask me. Now we either return the car seats to Amazon and buy new ones or we try to sell the used Snap-N-Go we got and forego the ease it’ll bring us for the first 6 months. Ugh. And we must choose quickly as we could need those little car seats any damn day now!
So, as these kinds of things pop up, Gina and I can feel our patience running thin, which I think would be normal under any circumstance but add the stress of “Oh my God, we are gonna have two babies with us in a matter of weeks!” and it becomes a bit much. Our antidote last night was to blame each other for about 10 minutes and then go silent. I looked over at her and glimpsed red yarn on her wrist- a symbol of strength and love for us and the babies. Then I looked at her profile and all I could see was love. She must have felt my vibe cause she said, “Do we still have do-overs in this house?” She came over on the couch and crawled in my arms and we hugged a lot. A bit later, getting ready for bed, we gave each other a good pep talk about how great we are doing, how much we’ve accomplished, what an awesome team we are, how blessed we are by all our friends and family and how at the end of day, none of the little shit matters… at all. Not even the car seats. Worst case scenario, it’ll work out.
In other news… my energy has been up more this week and so I actually made it out of the house for something other than a doc appointments– TWICE! It was so fun! I felt like a free bird. So this is what the fall leaves and the roads look like right now? Gorgeous.
We went to dinner at Fire on the Mountain on Friday night. We went early, ate food that actually tasted yummy to me (again, relief!) and I even drank a non-alcoholic beer! Good times, I tell ya. I moved slowly and Gina carried my bag…we got lots of looks– I loved it.
Then Sunday morning, G slept in, I bathed and later we ate bacon. Mmmm. We went to two baby shops to use the gift certificates we were so generously gifted. We picked up everything from reusable cloth baby wipes (which are expensive! Sheesh!) to an additional baby wrap for Gina. It was fun just looking around the shops together. I know it sounds crazy, but in all this time, we’ve never just gone baby shopping for ourselves. We put all the practical stuff we’d need on the registry and we love it all, but out in a store picking up even one little baby outfit ourselves… we had yet to do. Suffice to say, it was really, really fun and sweet to do together.
In the shops, Gina would bring me a chair and I’d sit while we oohed and awed at everything. In the car we talked about how grateful we are that we are gonna have TWO baby girls and if we hadn’t gotten pregnant on this one last attempt what our lives would have looked like right now. It was a good reality check and enough to make us giddy with joy.
Names
We settled on the names! Like, for sure, 99%. Pending one doesn’t come out a boy or we are just really suddenly clear one of those names is NOT for one of theses girls… but otherwise, we’re sure. We’ve been pretty sure for a long while but every now and then we’d consider a new name and play with it for a spell. We’d always come back to these two names that we started with. This past weekend we thought about varying aspects and elements of the names, talked through the pros, cons, middle names, nick names, last names… you name it (no pun) and in the end, we love them. I LOVE them. They feel so right and so “them”. Gina and I even think we know who’s who in there… but we’ll wait from them to tell us when we meet them.
It Takes a Village
For me, I find it so difficult to want to just “take care of” and “move on things” at my pace yet not be able to do any of it. On top of that, I must rely on Gina to do it all when she is a) working so much it’s near impossible to do it all, and b) she has a much slower pace that I do. It’s been such a practice in letting go. Every damn day. Seriously. Especially when I’m home on bedrest and ALL I have to think about is what needs doing: from the dirty floors to the smoke alarms.
This past week we got lots of help from friends: Marsha and David brought food and helped with some electrical and carpentry stuff that needed doing. Sonja brought homemade chicken pot pie (which tasted great– such a treat) and friend Jen B. brought lunch, salves, mother’s milk tea and gifts from her twin girls. Pema is moving from Portland to San Francisco but will move in with us this last week; she’ll be able to help with my care, food, etc. Again, blessed with community and friends. It so takes a village.
Me
I had a massage last week at the STRONG urging of my OB. I forewent my chiro and my acupuncture in exchange for the massage. It was the right choice. It helped relax me and helped a bit with my numbing so I am sleeping a tad better at night. My swelling is slightly better too.
The past week I’ve felt great spurts of energy which I know is normal at this late stage but still, feels surreal after having been so exhausted. I also feel happier. Less heavy. More able to deal with the pain, fatigue and exhaustion. Even up for a few more visitors this past week which I could barely do the week before. Even my OB noticed and said, “Wow. You look better.” It feels good to feel better, makes me realize too how many hormones are coursing through me and how much say they have over my mood.
All that said, I am nauseas again. More on the paradox of pregnancy eh? I went for a good month or more there with no vomiting or nausea– now that’s back. Apart from the pot-pie and dinner out (above), most all food looks and tastes icky to me again…but, I choke it down anyway as these are the last few weeks the girls are really gaining fat. And we want them plumped up. I can’t wait until food tastes normal and good again.
I feel the babies a lot less these days too. Apparently, because they have way less room to move, this is normal. It’s slightly unnerving but so long as I feel them roll an arm or head or get hiccups– we’re good. Gone are the days of kicking me strongly.
Sleeping and getting comfortable is really difficult now. My belly is just so big it’s hard for my small frame to support it. Rolling over, getting up, changing positions is uncomfortable at best and more often that not, painful (both in my torso area and my pubic symphasis). As much as I loved my water class, I think it’s officially over for me. I just can’t quite get there on my own anymore.
Babies
There’s actually not a lot to report on the little ladies medically speaking. Their hearts are beating well and no tests have been done this week. They are just growin’! They seem to shift a bit together side to side and sometimes they both move in close to one side. My whole belly goes sideways and into contraction mode which feels intense but it’s VERY cool.
More fun stuff on the girls…
My baby B likes to roll her head around on the top of my belly so I often find my hand just cupping her head much of the day. Sometimes she pushes so far up it looks like there’s a tennis ball poking up from the top of my belly! I love it. My baby A like to flutter her feet on my insides, deep down by my cervix and bowels. Baby A also puts her little hand or elbow up by her head all the time and it makes a (large) marble sized bump right around the left center of my belly. I will touch her and feel her and talk to her, “We’re holding hands, baby” I tell her.
They get the hiccups a lot still and I like to play them music or sing to them.
Last week I ordered all the rest of the Donor files from our Cryobank (an interview, personality assessment, and a facial features report). I filed it away for our girls to have someday if they should ever want or ask.
Lastly, I’m working on their baby books now. Not too much too do before they are born, just all the pregnancy, ultrasound pics and stuff, but it’s fun to start. Even if I don’t have much energy, I have the time so off we go!
Below are some pics last week… not all great quality, but you’ll get the gist.
Until soon,
regina
p.s. Happy Halloween!!! Hoping to get this belly painted as a jack-o-lantern or something! Stay tuned.
Chicken Pot Pie- ala Sonja
Sonja with the famous pot-pie. Mmmmm.
35 weeks
35 weeks
