7 month Bliss

I’ve never been one to be rigorous about a schedule or rhythm to a day. In fact, if you looked at my Hogan, you’d see that “Prudence” and anything else related to time in (what I used to think as) a limited sort of way, is simply not in my nature.

Having two babies has changed me. I’m grateful for the white board tracking when they last slept and ate—keeping a steady, natural rhythm in their life. Especially in the first six months.

I’ve learned that most babies thrive on routine and rhythm– what some may even call “schedule.” My babies are no different. They love the routine of their days (for them, they have plenty variety each day). And I love the benefits rhythm brings to them. They are happy, secure and steady. I also love that I know how much they slept– especially if it’s different from the other– or if they are hungry sooner than normal hinting at a pending growth spurt.

Which makes it all the more interesting that last Thursday, for one of the first times since they’ve had a regular bedtime, we stayed out late.

It’s summer. And it was Last Thurdsday on Alberta street. We’re moving soon and, likely, this could be one of our last art walks in our ‘hood for months to come. So when Gina called at 4pm and said she’s on her way home, I got the babes fed, changed and loaded up to go. Off we went on foot… cruising the hippie, grungie, summer-time digs of Portland, OR.

The girls smelled nag champa incense, marijuana, and fried churros all for the first time. They saw street performers juggling knives while walking on stilts, musicians playing weird homemade instruments and strange, colorful art. They gazed up as people passing by cooed at how adorable they were (either one occasionally giving a heart-melting smile).

Even though I’ve been eating clean (veggies, fruit, meat and nuts) for three weeks now, I let my self splurge a little that evening. We stopped for a PNW microbrew and few tasty bites. The girls, though well into the hour of their bedtime routine, were cheerful champs. They loved the whole scene.

On the way home, racing the clock through the back streets away from the masses and still 25 blocks away, both babies pooped. The red-face grunting gave it away. 🙂 We stopped to change diapers and realized that in our little emergency bag at the bottom of the double stroller we had only one diaper and one wipe left. Oopsie! After cracking up (C and G may not have thought this part so funny), we managed to improvise with a tiny burp cloth and a baby bottle of water/prune juice. We diapered only one baby (because hey, we are doing infant potty teaching now anyway) and off we went. One of us pushed the stroller while the other stayed out in front of the girls doing little songs and dances to keep the girls laughing instead of crying (by now tired and hungry—we had gotten out a little further and later than intended). To add to the urgency, I had to pee. Given I carried two babies in my womb, my bladder is not quite as efficient as it used to be. Each time I laughed, I lost a little fluid. If this wasn’t so fucking hysterical, it’d be very sad. Lucky for us, (and unlucky for my panties) we laughed the whole way home. Sometimes we laughed so hard that we had to stop and hold our bellies and wipe our eyes (or, in my case, cross my legs). The girls stared wide-eyed, smiling and giggling too. It was pretty awesome.

We got home, about 15 minutes past when they would normally be asleep and made a game time plan– mind you, a normal bedtime routine takes about 45 minutes. I peed, first thing. Gina changed babies, I did bottles. Before we knew it we were holding our little angels in the comfort of their nursery, back in the rhythm of their life. With their own familiar smells, sounds and mamas.

In the end, they fell asleep quickly, about an hour later than normal. While I don’t think it’s a good idea to do this even once a week, it was so well worth it that evening. It wasn’t a wedding or a funeral or anything so big it could be well justified. It was just a Portland summer night. But to us, it was everything.

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Life with the girls continues to be mind blowing. They are discovering and opening newly every day.

Genevieve, who was so stoic and serious, has blossomed. She is a giggle machine. Sometimes laughing for minutes on end just for seemingly no reason at all. Calliope has taken off crawling, sitting up and enjoying her newly found autonomy.

At some point I’ll need to go back to work. Perhaps even a Jay-Oh-Bee (job) with benefits and the like. Until then, I’m savoring every routine-filled day with my sweet, sweet angels.

 

Highlights and Milestones

Together
They ADORE each other. They are interacting, playing and engaging now more than ever. On the floor for playtime and in their cribs the hour before bed, they play, talk and crawl all over each other. I’ve never seen two people more in love with each other (particularly Genevieve with Calliope). Gina and I will be lucky to come in a close second to the other’s sister.

I’d say that changing diapers (along with pottying) is the biggest challenge and past time around here. Each girl likes to kick, twist, buck and in general do anything other than lay flat for a diaper change now. And given that I do them mostly on the living room floor in order to keep close eye on the other, the sister inevitably likes to come along and put her hands all over the poopy diaper I’ve just changed. By the time I’m done with just one diaper change, sweat is beading off my face and under my arms. And then there’s round two. It really is like a comedy show every time someone poops. Unfortunately for me, that’s pretty damn often given they are both on three solid food meals a day now.

Potty teaching, also known as Elimination Communication (EC) is going really well…Calliope knows exactly what to do when she gets on the potty. Genevieve may know as well but she’s not at all concerned with whether she does it or not. We don’t push, praise or shame; we simply keep offering the opportunity to go and acknowledge when they relieve themselves somewhere other than their diaper. “Hey, look! You went pee/poo on the potty. That’s where pee/poo goes.” And then we get on with life as usual. They seem to get the gist.

I make all their food and they’ve had just about everything we eat now in terms of fruits and veggies (apart from a few major allergens like strawberries and honey). They are great eaters, too. They love zucchini, squash, plums, sweet potatoes, sweet peas, carrots, yogurt, oatmeal, adzuki beans, cauliflower (okay, G is not a fan of cauliflower I’ll admit, but we’ll try again), mashed potatoes, pears, apples, watermelon (they LOVE watermelon), and the list goes on. The other night I made dinner for Gina and myself and I was able to take two of the veggies being served and just puree them with our magic puree stick our dear friend Sarah gave us so that G and C ended up eating the same veggies as us for dinner (just ours were not pureed). It was really cool.

The thing I hear most about my girls is how “engaged”, “bright”, “alert” they are. My friend Jill said to me, “that’s because they are present.” I think she’s right. They are totally present. It’s the way Gina and I BE with them. We treat them as two tiny humans, holding all their big selves in those tiny little bodies. We respect them (while holding their boundaries) and we trust them. I like that people see that they are present. Without even knowing that’s what I was shooting for, as their mama, it’s likely sweetest thing I could hear. 

Calliope
At 7.5 months she is about 15.5lbs and 26.5 inches. She is still such a little peanut (10th percentile for height and weight). She’s super flexible and agile, my mom tells me that I was just like that.

She has two teeth on the bottom and is teething again (likely her top). Mainly you can just see the one tooth on the bottom though and it’s adorable as ever.

She smiles ALL THE TIME. From the moment she wakes up, she pushes up on her arms and grins and giggles, even when it’s 5am and she “should” be sleeping. Her gift to the world is pure happiness.

She’s fast, too. She crawls fast, moves fast, and learns fast. She’s been an early teether, early eater and early in all her fine and gross motor skills. She eats like there is no tomorrow and we often need to slow her down and/or stop her from gorging herself. She loves her mama’s home cooked food and her bottles.

If I had to sum her up in one word it would be passionate.

Genevieve
Our little happy Buddah. She weighs 17.5lbs, is about 30.5inches long and falls squarely in the 95th percentile for height and 50th for weight. She’s tall. People remark all the time. They think she’s much older than she is because of her height. She wears clothes that are 12-18mos.

She’s not grumpy or hard to please by any stretch of the imagination but compared to Calliope, she certainly doesn’t give her smiles away for free. That being, if one of us helps make her smile or giggle, it’s like going to heaven; all the world is complete. She’s so pure it’s an honor to be in her presence.

She’s slower than Calliope in her development but still on the early side of the curve, if not smack in the norm. She’s sitting up on her own, combat crawling or rolling to get where she wants, has two cute little teeth on the bottom and revolves her world around her sister.

When Calliope is in sight, G is happy. Giggling even. Rolling on her, touching her, grabbing her toy (or her hair) and in general, eating her sister up. Calliope seems to vacillate from indifference to loving this attention. For G, it’s like C is Santa Clause or the Good Fairy (or fill in your favorite make-believe hero/ine).

Gina and Me
We are good. We had some pretty yucky breakdowns, but as usual, they led to some really lovely breakthroughs. We are (finally) having sex again, talking at length (about politics, parenting, and of course, our amazing daughters), and in general, sneaking in moments to enjoy each other’s company. Two nights ago we found ourselves dancing to Jason Mraz’s version of Summer Breeze in the girls’ nursery while they watched from G’s crib. They loved it so much that we each picked a babe up and the whole family danced and sang together. Safe to say, we were all in heaven.

The house has two offers; an initial offer and a back up offer. We’ll likely move in September or October. Not sure whereto yet but likely NW or SW. I’m looking forward to the change in pace but not the packing and ridding of massive amounts of “stuff” we’ve managed to collect the last decade. Our summer will be mostly dedicated to that. I’ll be happy when we are on the other side and moved in to wherever our new home will be.

My Musings
For now, I’m enjoying our last few months (and last summer) in our home and in our neighborhood.

My body is finally starting to look a bit more like itself (fun!). Stopping pumping worked! My breast size went from a 34J to a 34G. Down THREE cup sizes. Whew! They are still too big and my back still hurts but the unbearable pain is off. Now I’m just down to daily annoying, icky pain. The edge that I couldn’t stand is gone and my boobies are much, much more manageable. I even got two new bras, one for jogging that I’m thrilled about (previously, I couldn’t even find anything). Breast reduction is still on the horizon but on hold for now.

Calliope won’t nurse anymore… between teething and nipple confusion, she lost her ability or interest. Her time is up. When I let myself sink in to this, I cry. I wonder what I could have done differently, what I did wrong… but that always leads me back to a place where I realize, I did the best I could and only what I knew how to do. In the first 6 months it was like triage around here—no joke. Having two babies just simply isn’t like having one. Some things are doubly sweet, and some things there are losses. This is likely for me (maybe even more than a vaginal birth) the biggest loss of all. To compensate, I give her lots of extra mama-time, cuddles and love.

Genevieve still nurses at night and on occasions (bonks on the head, getting shots, overly tired) but otherwise when I put her to my breast, she rejects it. This makes me a tad sad as I really love nursing, especially now that I have my body a bit more normal and life a bit more manageable. Alas, it’s G who calls the shots, so I just keep offering. I’ll do so until she doesn’t want it anymore.

In the meantime, we count our blessings every day. “Who knew?” we say to each other every night when we go to sleep. Who knew? Who knew our hearts could hold so much joy, so much love and that we could be so incredibly blessed with two amazingly beautiful, giddy, unique, wonderful daughters. I am so grateful we got two. I can’t imagine our lives now, any other way.

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Linda Brooks, our dear friend and amazing photographer, came to Portland for a visit. She photographed our girls in the park and randomly threw us in a few pics too. The result was incredible. She captured our girls and our family in a way that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at the photos.

As a gift, she created a short video (photo montage) which is simply gorgeous.  Check it out here.

Here’s a collection of other photos from June (month 7)